I've never cared about your conniving and manipulative ways but when it starts to involve me... it makes me boil with anger and disappointment!

---

Another piece fell off my heart and I am panicking panicking panicking. I'm panicking! The brut is making my head spin and I can't breath. I'm panicking.

By the way when I was uncorking the brut there was a loud POP! that I totally wasn't expecting - I thought it was a gunshot. Thank goodness the bottle didn't slip off my hand.

---

Hello. Hennessy Artistry was okay - I forgot that I hang out with a bunch of photographers u_u I made a discovery though: Mr Sam! I don't usually tune in to these music but he was goooood.

Here are pictures from my mum's birthday, which is a day before Chee Weng's ;D We planned a surprise dinner for her but she showed up an hour early D:


I chose to bake a fudge topped brownie for mum because I haven't found a decent cake recipe yet. Do you have any to recommend?


He made mashed potatoes


Preparing salad


Steph & Paul made spaghetti and mac n cheese, and the kakaks made fried rice.


Aunty May made fried chicken.


Chillin out




Everybody




Unfortunately I forgot to add in the baking powder. Wtf? Mum said I just invented the brownie cookie, so it's okay. Decoration by me, Chee Weng and Wilson. DivaLai is the name we suggested for my mum when she wanted to make an e-mail/Facebook account.


This is my mum. She's on Facebook, go go go add her! ;P (notice the height of my baking powderless brownie) (it's okay because it still tasted very YUM YUM)


Guess what they're watching.



Okay, gonna go have porridge steamboat with sister Gemo, Daddy TJ and Uncle KC. Have a good a week! It's my last week before college starts :(

If these scars are to stay, I wonder if you will still love me? Wtf. Actually they worry me too but I can't help it wtf sendiri cari pasal.

Something is bugging me.

I got to spend Xindi & Shuyan's last hour home with them OHOHOHO. Wtf. Don't want them to leave T^T

I want to write descriptive posts, but these days I can't seem to write anything. I'm rather upset that the holiday is ending soon.

I am chatting with Nat in pinyin. Wtf.

Here are some pictures from Chee Weng's birthday party. Very selective pictures, because I'm too lazy to browse the pictures properly. 300+ pictures lor okay. I know it's supposed to be about his party but these are mostly just pictures of people I like to be around. I was a little off that night, sorry if I ignored some of you. I'm just not comfortable around strangers.


Sigh. Nothing will come between him and his shisha, not even me. So sad.


"Dad".


Xris burned his hand with the shisha head and these splattered on the floor, Chee Weng said it's his blood and Xindi asked if he has HIV.


My boyfriend who once upon a time couldn't tolerate a single sip of beer is now an alcoholic barrel.


There are three things that I love in this picture: My hair, Jean and Gin's chocolate chip cookies.


Arrival of other family wtf.


Most Entertaining Couple 2008 & 2009.






Daddy TJ, Boyfriend CW and Uncle KC.

What am I, CX? Not nice -_-


Xris and Ian, they both make me laugh ;D


Like I said, alcoholic barrel. Sometimes it irritates me but I cannot say anything because I drink my fair share too ._.


I cracked up when I saw this


Waiting for things, problems and time to pass.

Today I had the most fun in months - it wasn't like just fun in the afternoon, or fun in the night - it was morning til night nonstop catching our breath from laughing too much. At one point Chee Weng, Xindi and I just couldn't stop laughing at this office place that it looked like we just took drugs or summat. I had my first Klang bak kut teh and it didn't live up to all the hooha - it took us 45 minutes to find the place.

I am also very hungry now, and am craving for the flavoured milk straw thingy.

These pictures are from the night where I 'planned' to attend this Michael Jackson Tribute Night at Zouk and reached there about an hour after the event ended. Wtf? Music was crap that night.


Gin I miss your smile :)










Bloody skeletal hand looks like it belongs to someone else.




Weirdest wink ever.

Good job, Sam. Once a failure always a failure. You can't run from it.

I've always just suspected and not understand, but tonight it was more apparent than ever. I was just... not comfortable at all, it was like having episodes, you know. Seizures. But not so physical. It just takes something apart from me. If strangers have this adverse effect on me at this age, what is it going to do to my career? Humans are such complex systems, there should be a manual.

I enjoyed the last quarter of the night because it was just us. People I know.

Sitting on a hard metal chair where Gin was a moment ago - TJ in front, KC on the right. Now, drink on my left, abandoned shisha bottle on my right. Empty Pall Mall pack behind my laptop, disappointment.The pack of ice is dripping water onto my slippers. I figured out Ian's magic trick in a jiffy. Mixers, liquor, empty bowls and mugs are on the counters - it's become a freakin ant haven. I hate ants.

Laptop is playing Van Morrison's These Are The Days - how apt...

Yo! We are waiting for Xindi and while waiting we will be heading to have some mouthwatering cheese naan. Soon. Right now we're in a place where there's a useless pool-fountain right in front of us - I think decorative pools are a waste of water, especially when it's not pretty to begin with.

Today Chee Weng said, a good friend is a person who scolds you when you're doing something wrong.

ING!!!!!! I'm a Level 4+++ friend!!!! Do you miss my scoldings??? :D:D:D:D:D

Oh, Terk Chern once again has a tragic story to tell. His life is so full of drama - not that it's a good thing, they're all actually rather dangerous situations. Damn bad luck can. I will collect more karma points for you Terk Chern!!!

Hey hey, does anyone recognise this lyric:

You gotta believe that I got what it takes

To stand out!!
Above the crowd
Even if I gotta shout out loud
`Til mine is the only face you'll see
Gonna stand out

`Til you notice me

IT'S POWERLINE YO!!!!!!! I used to jump around singing and dancing to it as though Powerline is a real life singer wtf. It's like one of the first few (and raaaare) pop song that I was obsessed about. And Eye To Eye. Aiya all the songs from The Goofy Movie la.

I think Titanic is the Camille of our time. ...Probably more like Casablanca but I haven't seen it yet so shaddup. Anyway. I watched Titanic for the 67th time today sigh I still get so emotional when the ship sinks ;_;

I wanna watch M, the synopsis sounds interesting, but it's a German movie and I'm too lazy to look for it online with subtitles. Maybe that DVD shop that Gin recommended would have it... hey! They had Les Choristes D: Okay, so Les Choristes wasn't a 1930s movie. So what. They should stock good movies right!

Aii. I'm gonna watch The Reader tomorrow. The Taking of Pelham 123 was extremely disappointing. I've heard of the original version before and had always wanted to watch it, but this remake is just terrible. But John Travolta was still sexy and his voice still gives me a high mmmmmm!

Harry Potter & The Half-Blood Prince!!!! EKSAITED!!!!!!! I already tried to reserve tickets but the GSC website is going bonkers on me!!!!

So many exclamation mark!!!!!!!!! I typoed exclamation nut I dunno wtf kind of typo is that. I feel hyper but it's 4am and there is no one here to layan me.

This entry is so retarded I don't know why I'm typing this instead of going to sleep.

Crazy mix of emotions and thoughts, my mind could explode from all the information that are swimming in my head, crowding over each other and refusing to leave.

I love Winter Wonderland and White Christmas. I like just about any versions there are available.

I've heard of David Lynch through Mulholland Drive which I have not yet watch, but always wanted to. Gin once sent The Alphabet to me, but I was alternating the tabs between blogs and stuff so it didn't have much impact on me. I saw it again just now. I am absofuckingly freaked out, it makes me just want to curse all the time, that fucking shit. I don't know whether I'm horrified or in awe. I then proceeded to watch Six Figures Getting Sick, it's one sick video okay. And then I watched The Grandmother which was so freakingly spooky I had to stop after ten minutes.

I don't get spooked out by horror/ghost movies, but this David Lynch is one sick dude!

I needed to calm my nerves and somehow I went on to Youtube Disney classics. I have to say, I loved The Little Mermaid. Sequels in general suck, but I liked The Little Mermaid 2 as well. And I loved Pocahontas (OH John Smith). I used to pretend to scrub the floors the way emo Cinderella did. There was once I don't know why but I suddenly stood up and swung an imaginary kitten around ala The Nutcracker Prince (not Disney) and everyone was laughing at me, damn malu, it was like I was in a trance or something wtf. I used to brush my hair and fling them around as though I'm a Disney princess with their big flowy hair (think Ariel and Jasmine). Pinocchio, Anastasia, Mulan.

Funny how children cartoons spreading messages of hope and love are sometimes adapted from dark, sadistic stories - Prince Eric married another princess and the mermaid turned into sea foam, Cinderella's sisters cut their feet in order to fit the glass shoe and eventually had their eyes pecked by pigeons. E.T.A. Hoffman's The Nutcracker & The Mouse King was a dark story with no sugarplum fairies at all.

There are also the dead romantic love songs in the Disney cartoons - Kiss The Girl, If I Never Knew You, Can You Feel The Love Tonight - we've heard them a thousand times, but have you listened to the lyrics? And then you watch the sequence in the cartoons and they're all so heartbreakingly in love and you wonder if you'd ever find that kind of storybook love in the real world.

But from the kind of stories I've been hearing recently, it just confirms my ideas on love and monogamy - the ones that I've learnt from my very own home. I could fall on my knees and have tears streaming down my cheeks and my heart hollowed out wishing love for the people around me, but is never up to me.

It's sad, really. If I could love like Sorcha and Red, Liadan and Bran, Fainne and Darragh - I would say that it is my greatest achievement in my entire lifetime. There was a quote in the book where Father Brian said he wouldn't wish for anyone to love like that, for when the other half leaves the world, your heart leaves too.

In my world, nobody has ever experienced a love like that.

I'm down with flu and fever, sucks. I blame MidValley.

I just realised that almost every entry I have posted since the holidays had something about the movies that I've watched. As you can see I'm an expert couch potato already. No movie updates for now because I haven't been watching any since the last post. Except for Transformers 2, and well, I couldn't get the fighting scenes because I just saw a whole mess of colours swirling around. Hmm.

I finally have the pictures up my walls (after like what, a year?), yes Amelia, your Audreys are up! Thanks so much for them :) Just a problem though, the cheap IKEA frames that I got are quite fragile up the wall, it's like they can fall off any moment, and I tend to abuse the wall when I'm terribly upset... What if in the midst of abusing the wall everything comes tumbling down? Wtf. I know, I'm not that strong, right...

Some pictures from Thursday night, it took me a while to find out that it was actually a Black Eyed Peas product launch event - most number of ugly pictures of me taken in one night. Fuh! I looked like I was high on drugs or something and I kept pulling all these annoying faces, and I remember staring at my reflection in the mirror posing and giggling and Chee Weng was like WTF LETS GO BIE.


BOOM. My hair covered it :(

That's the only normal looking picture of me because it was the only one taken before The Evil Glass consumption...


BOOM BOOM POW!




Xindi & TJ. Damn cute.




Azrin & Boyfriend


Gin & Fugz. Damn cute!


Gin, Shuyan, baldspot girl


Gins sexy bod wth


BOB/BOW/BOOB/POOP/MOM/POPO - Fugz should have won the BoomBoomPow competition that night.


Our own Lady Gaga X u_u




The not-so-dark TJ! He is my fahder, but quite a mean man.






Ian & Xindi.

Ian: Sam, you want beer?
Sam: Nope.
Ian: *stares in disbelief as though no one in the world had ever refused beer before me*


Shuyan, my Spot The Difference partner.


wtf?


It's his birthday next week yo!